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Last year an acquaintance killed himself. He was a bright young software engineer at one of the hot companies in our (small) city. Had an active social life and close friends, was in a relationship of several years. From the outside it looked like he had things going for him. However he apparently also had a long history of depression.

Just because we have so much more than other groups doesn't mean we have it made.



The expectations we put upon ourselves or are put on us can be higher than what we can achieve - being moderately well off and intelligent in the richest country in the world makes it very easy to be a disappointment to yourself or others, despite whatever success you may feel - it will never ever be enough.

This is keeping up with the joneses, just instead of the shiny new TV its a more ephemeral "life experiences" and success. Now, with the internet you're not even competing against your neighbor, you're competing against the world. Guess what - the world is always doing something more interesting, being more successful, having more fun than what you're doing. HN in particular exacerbates this issue. For some reading about successes is inspiring - for others it just shows them how far of a gap they have to go.


> the world is always doing something more interesting, being more successful, having more fun than what you're doing. HN in particular exacerbates this issue

HN? Aren't you talking about Facebook? Here now, I formulate another hypotheses about this suicide level rising: Facebook is causing suicide! Everybody is happier there.


Everyone is more productive, smarter, more successful than you on HN.


And Instagram.


I can relate to this and have each reaction at different times.


This.


Depression is an illness, often outside people's control. One might just as well be surprised to learn that a colleague broke his leg.


Absolutely. My reflection was inspired by the parent's comment, not on suicide in general. We should keep an eye out for symptoms in our friends despite their public façades and lend a hand if appropriate.


> Depression is an illness Well, not really. Depression is a "disorder". You can be more biologically predisposed to depression, but that isn't the same thing.


We don't know what causes depression, and there's a lot of evidence that it is an illness.


Sure, but unless you work remotely it's usually harder to hide the fact that you broke your leg.


People manage to hide being gay, heroin addicts and other things. Hiding depression is easy.


> People manage to hide being gay, heroin addicts and other things.

> Hiding depression is easy.

That's exactly what the OP said. On the other hand i'm not sure what homosexuality has to do with addiction, fractures or depression.


An experienced AS400 programmer in our organization recently shot himself ( 2013 ). His decades of RPG experience failed him. He tried but never made the transition to web development from the green screen. He never survived to retirement.


> He tried but never made the transition to web development from the green screen

Not really anything to stress about - AS400/RPG guys are some of the most sought after programmers and can get paid pretty much whatever they want.




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